I'll have my autonomy and a large frosty please!

I have been thinking about the objectification situation Dr. J talked about in the instance of being called a faggot at a party.  It struck a lot of thought because if I collected pennies from every time this scenario happened to me growing up, I’d own a cruise ship. I really want to attempt to break this scenario down because I think it is a great example of the existential crisis of being labeled as inferior by your peers, which applies to race, religion, sexuality, political views etc.

 I grew up with all older brothers and male cousins and being called a fag is almost part of your name.  The theme is here is typically masculinity or even hypermasculinity.  However, it really depends on the context as well, because we all became really desensitized to this behavior in my family. It was so extreme, that not being called a faggot was almost offensive.  However I could see that if some stranger came up and told that to me, my older brother would have kicked his ass.  This word is definitely a hate word in a foreign context, but in the home it was very watered down connotation. Being called a faggot on a regular basis wasn’t so much of a simple reminder to “hey, don’t grow up to be a homosexual” or “I hate you” as it was “hey, don’t be weak, don’t cry, don’t complain”. It is more of a type of in home psychological training.  So this language and demeanor strongly depends on the context which it is used I think.  “Hate words” like that have an abstract meaning that has complex psychological implications.  It could be jealousy, it could be hate, it could be situation irony, people use this word in many different ways.  However usually this type of discrimination is used to break someone down mentally and place themselves above you or vice versa.  The best way I’ve found to deal with this jab at your existence is to become resistant to the objectification.  If you know who or what you, then the are insults are meaningless.  It merely becomes a blank word. Almost like the person just mispronounced your name, and you want to kindly correct them.  It really throws people off when someone calls you that and you just smile and ask them how their day is going and if they need help with anything.  It’s a complete objectification reversal.  But with this level of resistance built up I think you do not objectify yourself and separate yourself from the situation as much.  So I think the key is not necessarily fighting back, but is rather not reacting what so ever and being completely immune to random forms of hate and attempts at social separation.

This social separation issue runs deep in human psychology I believe in the attempt to understand the self and its relation with others.  This situation could be anything, ie in Nazi Germany there were little skin color differences, but the main discrimination target was Judaism.  Thinking about it now  this seems like a really random and obscure thing to discriminate against.  As if that culture had to work really hard to find something to infantilize and make inferior. Which it seems like people that are insecure with their existence tend to make such attempts at lifting themselves above another.  Skin color just happens to be the easiest target for someone psychologically insecure with themselves to attempt separate themselves from others.  As long as people are insecure with themselves I think social structures will always attempt to form a social hierarchy, the same as it happens on the individual “calling someone a faggot” level.  Personally, as a white male I haven’t had to deal with the racial inferiority existential issue, however there is a strong masculine issue to deal with growing up that I discussed earlier.  Everyone has their own struggle with autonomy and existence.  Mine personally at Rhodes was the greek system.  It dominates the social culture here almost the same as race. Initially, as someone completely ignorant of greek life when I transferred in here my sophomore year, my first reaction was similar to the objectification crisis. I wanted to tell it to fuck off and do my own thing and rise above the inferiority of not being greek.  However I realize that there’s nothing wrong with not changing who I am for a particular social system just as black people should not attempt to change being black, but what is wrong is how you (and how I reacted) react to it I think. And to some degree I reacted to it.  Just as if someone called me faggot and I called them a faggot back. However there does appear to be some sort of hedonistic autonomic pleasure to telling domineering social systems attempting to change who you are to fuck off however.  But the real key appears to be just being above the trauma and not letting it bother you if you can’t change it.  -Meaning to not necessarily fight back either and make enemies. The best appears to lead by example and others will follow.  I think this concept applies to all forms of existential crises.  Either lead, follow or just don’t worry about something you can’t change.  

What do you guys think?

Should people fight back against domineering systems and make enemies out of them or just ignore / rise above the abuse and eventually people will see that the oppressed are happy and others will follow?

Please comment!!! :D